Yo! first time winning sofian..
in the game of chess...
my forth time playing(believe me, i got count)...
always playing with him n finally win..
luck ba, couldn't end our second game but i know he's gonna lose..
lol we both have same chances of winning xDD

get meiting to fold the piece of book for me..
wah ecilpse leh..$34!!
THAT's how much i cn pay if i saw one good book =DD

has she gone back to her original style?
I don't know but i'm beggin its not.
realise that sean's n meiting's standard had somehow..
Drop drastically frm the top of a cliff to the bottomless pit..
lols, another descriptive style of writing..

waited for then who had so much questions of maths installed for me..

p/s:sorry if i didn reply any of ur sms..
i'm running low liao..
preferably to use it in more urgent situations. xDD

i was like doing damn...
NOT hardworking...
i feel my standard dropping..
i know there's a conscept..
i know everything..
but dunno the formula..
wad's the use..

E-maths required ur brain to turn...
n someguys just dunhav the ability..
while some r RELLI good at it..
this is life, either u have it, or u don't...
its meaningless to gasp something that's no meant to be urs...
the moment where u have to use force,
u had already lost..
just sit back n relax, let nature take its course..

everything will end after sometime..
there's a beginning, there's an end somehow..
just that, the way ur ending may be different a bit..
but who could see the different?
oh ya, someppl r not living for others..
they lived for themselves eh?
letmee ask yaw, who feed u milk?
who teaches u?
who show u how to bang sai?
who cook for you?

somedays u will be just as them...
now u r living OFF them ok...

class is a chaos, especially 4 period of free period..
but i kept on doing maths...
i know i'm very guai larh...
hmm, don't know why but she may have changed place..
FOR A LONG TIME..
i hate her mans..
why does she change place in the first place?
kns, busoong lorhh..
no like i was the one who started it first..
xiang dang nian(not very long ago larh)
i change place with malek..
her kns face n *@#$! words...
that's not quite welcoming ok..

why should i be welcoming to her then?
but well, i couldn't just follow her..
its just not my style!!
don't care bout wad others think..
don't care bout anywhere else..
n have my beauty sleep...
its too troublesome to quarrel n everything..
as a lazy person, i just wanted my life to be normal...

go poly, go university..
get an ok ok job(office one),
stop living off my parents at age 25..
get married with an okok wife
with 2 childrens..
1 male, one girl...
living to 50years old n die..
is that too much to ask?

i think that is.. nvm la!
Elyn is so cute..
leaving her pen with me for so many days..
n constantly didn take it back from me..
i saw her going home..
se even say bye but this thought nvr cross her mind..
LOL.

is that called a drive?
no life. boring~

i'm totally convinced that i lost my drive...
things seems so uninteresting...
going to my lalaland is the first place i ever wanted to go..
exam coming already but didn even prepare one...
i hate losing.. i HATE being the LAST...
i will win, for i'm winson..
or at least, not getting the last!?
well, not studing will be a total gone case for me..
but still, i wun study until i got the mood to...
sian sian sian, geography coming...
that stupid subject!!
err maybe i gonna start on Maths first...
as in when? well, it depends.. xP

english i fail fail fail larhhs
today first thing play english chess with sofian..
its my first time playing..
n i'm not so bad.. managably kill all the pieces in sofian...
but coz donno that the soldier when go to the end will become any piece..
i've overlook that, n the rest of the pieces get killed when exchanging..
she talked to me again..
well, it doesn't seemed much of a deal these days...
i'm through but don't know why...
somehow or rather, deep within my heart...
i know my hatred still implies..
i've absolutely no control over it mans..

geo lesson is a score of a time...
miss wong how old already? still play this kind of game..
shanxian speak up, with sufiyan they all...
while shafiq be the opposition team, with atiqah they all...
so who m i with? dun make me repeat myself...
this kind of situation, I'm neutral know...
but somehow... something in "there" is buggin me...
it has been totally unlike myself at that time...
wad happen to me anyways? why i suddenly become...
nvm, manage to welcome miss wong back...
with me n sufiyan sitting on top of the chair outside the classrooms..

bryan is great at playing chess...
but i didn say he's good as sofian..
well, i guess better players dunhav to kill...
they protect, protect, n they lost..
with all the game over, with so many pieces on the game itself..
pro ARE pros.. chinese chess also... finally have some drive..
but the communication line break, back to me again,..
lazy for everything=.=

ya still got one thing to talk...
ok.. i know this post is damn long...
but i got one very important thing to fa xie!!!
or else i will lost my mind..
ok.. i'm already crazy...

but hor damn angry lo...
u know wad my f****** say ma?
he F***'in B******* say wad, help me go down n buy things..
i was like ok, sian diao, who will be happy doing this kinda things?
n he started with the fighting scenario
lao pa"ASK YOU TO DO LITTLE THING U ALSO DON'T WANT!!I DO HOUSEWORK N ALL LEH!! WAD DID YOU DO UH!!??"
Me:(housework he want to do himself one, if not, i'll be doing it at home)(he didn do anything else.. ok.. help my brother to wash his dishes ba)
lao pa"SEE I GIVE YOU COMPUTER, HANDPHONE.. N I DOING NIGHT-SHIFT VERY TIRED ONE LEH!!!"
i was like...
WTF, COMPUTER MOTHER BUY ONE LARH!! HANDPHONE I BUY ONE LARH!!N HOR!!! WHOSE THAT IDOIT WHO HAPPILY LAUGHING THERE N TELL ME... I CHANGE TO NIGHTSHIFT LAO WOR WITH THAT HAPPY FACE...
LIKE MY FAULT LIKEDAT...
that's my limit..
BOOM!!

ok chilled now..
probably seen have bruises
muahahhaas

yesterday forgot to type..
ahyer, MR JACK CHONG!!!
kns lo.. say my name infront of so many ppl ok..
hell, "say winson, crush the paper!"
coz i was concentrating on something else..
n then like xiao dao lo..
waliao even natalie sitting beside me de laugh lo...
diu lian larhs... Grr..
will nvr forget one..
n today damn xiao xia..
lao ngoh ask calisa" you malay?"
i was like bursting out of laughter!!
hahas yup, she's a malay^^

sian sian sian...
wrong format, wrong word, wrong vocab, wrong grammar, WRONG GENRE!!!
oh great, now i'm sure my MT will also fail as well...

meiting nvr pei wo...
alone again liaox...
go library n saw shiyi they all...

haiz, praying next tests will not be THAT difficult..
especially Maths, A-maths, Geography, Social Studies, Chemistry, physics..
yup all subject are my weakness..
I DUNWANNA RETAIN!!!!
MY DETERMINATION WILL NEVER DIE...

ok, cut the chase,
today started with the english paper1..
i was determined to succeed, that time..
sean, meiting, zhenhui sat down n
we do all we cn in that period of time given to us by god
i'm quite confident of my standard actually..
regardless of failing countless times...
i dared not imagine or go n actually COUNT for myself..
but wad i know is that.. its A LOT!!!
maybe beyond your wildest imaginations!!
having courage to stand up countless times...
hmm, i'm starting to think i'm not somebody who could be easily reckoned with..
ok, stop being full of myself here...
ok, i saw the paper n i immediately chose one topic without ANY DELAY!!

Fear, hmm, coz i recently being doing one word title..
so i decided on it!!
hearing bi jie from last time say..
if ur compo doesn't contain any scars,
but u biao xian(showed) out, that's a piece of masterpiece..
used every single vocab i cn think of...
n in other ppl's eyes, i'm still a loser...
showed them my draft..
n so many grammar mistake..
most of it is gone de...
but everyone always say the same thing...
i cnnt express well, but i know wad i want to express..
vocab's quite good..
its all the same =.=

paper 2..
that one i die..
i don't when the paper start..
i just know when i did finished...
calisa was like so fast..
shifu also...
sianz.. is it that easy?
well, i left 40 minutes of free time after checking...
but when i ask ppl their ans..
i was like Oh Ya! again...

dead dead dead, there has been 4 wrongs in my compre liaoz..
i dunwan to think of more..
someone help?

Aiya!
damn danger arh! tomorow english exam liaos...
die die also must get 60 marks for that test mans..
At LEAST must get 56 marks to JUST PASS!!!
teachers dun seemed much concern bout our grades..
i meant english teachers..
i was like failing..
zhenyang was like failing for all three semesters..
n teachers duneven say a word...

what does these all means anyways?
everyone will surely get into sec4?
so there's no need to worry bout?
if u all r not an all-round failure,
they wun let u retain again!!??

well, its hopeless to speculate wad they r doing...
as the conclusion will be futile..
that's a good word. Humph.
coz not enough proof to support ur findings..
like as if not enough evidence so cnnt sue him likedat!

i think i done all i can le ba!
ask teachers to give me extra work..
regardless of that teacher is Angelia tan..
which she gave me a pass..
saying that my compo the language usage is good..
but failed to understand the topic qns..
which means i was outta point then..
16/30. hmm..
now concentrating on compre...
that! needs Urgent attention!!

JIA YOUS WINSON!!

Life is so boring...
humans r even worst..
why things dun interest me at all?
why things r always so predictable?
why everything is within my gasp?
nothing interest me now..
maybe i will just rot at home..

killing...
hmm, imagine seeing..
a person's eye exploded,
u r smashing his brains..
pull the trigger right at his throat..
imagine blood spattered everywhere..
bone n skin fragments lieing over you..

that's quite interesting,
if its shown in real life..

hope something unexpected will happened..

i won't say anything coz if i said,
i would have EXPECTED it..

sian sian sian...

began more n more obvious to me that...
zhenyang is an attention seeker...
in class that is... LOL.
n clearer and clearer to solve the mystery behind redzuan..
oo, BIG NEWS!! ^^
it appears that i have dropped in standards...
not listening to teachers n doing homework ba...
holy shit.
my bastard brother stole $3000...
i'm not joking...
he a piece of asshole shits..
nvm, lets get TO the point...
today got that mid autumn something..
n i was like carrying a WHOLE lot of books n files...
if i hadn't covered them up using the files...
that would have been A LOT bigger ok...
then "he" the shen mi ren(mystery man) ask me to..
give flowers of two gal...
i say ok lo.. delivery man only wad..
wad's the big deal?
little i know is that, delivery man is a BIG deal.
first target, manting...
keep wanting me to tell her his name..
waliao, yinching bu zai(not in) i could speak with no worries..
or wadsoever..but then oh well...
she dun accept or should i say..
she gave it back to me? hahas
at least i gain a $2 ok hahas.
second one..
wah so many friends there mans..
n wu hui(not black) i give one..
n also didn accept..
=.=that's bad.. for a beginner..
but at least i holded manting's hand, or she hold my hand..
*nosebleed*
ok this one copy sabrina de..
hehe ok, i'm back to myself again..
ONCE again, but human change, dun expect me to be like last time!
heyy couldn't not admit, she is a chio bu..
or else she wouldn't hav known so well how to handled in this situation..
n her friends like not seeing this for the first time..
lols.
physics make up lab session hor..
actually i got that right one..
yan qin n her friend say in 3rd floor..
i was going there when i met james..
who's going to the robotics lab.
hmm, talk to him but then, forgot everything..
bout the 3rd floor that is when shifu came sooner after..
great.. we walked around like forever until shanxian came
n zhi dian mi jing(show the confusing sutras)
we ran and ran but there r still someone later than us...
great... the experiment was so easy that i could fart on it..
then was the siting with the girls n talk time..
girls r amazing creatures..
unlike male who made things so obvious for other ppl..
unlike those mature ladies or women..
coz their next move was so predictable..
girls r so annoying that they became a joy..
coz its so difficult to guess wad they r thinking...
ok enough of that..
i speculate no one's able to understand wad i'm tryin' nae say.
back to the topic on today,
the girls treat me food..
biscuits to be exact, n saw an exciting moment..
boonhao actually being gan diao by these girls..
wah dunsee them laugh laugh laugh..
actually at jiang hu shang(long yellow river there)very powerful one..
or is boonhao scared of mrs kok..
wah like they say her name boon hao was like..
-.-sneered a bit.. laugh to act shuai but i cn feel an underlying tension..
now boonhao's name become boonhua liao..
girl power is not to be covered..
pei fu!^^

today go for the Ne Yang poly thingy..
teach us how to do cosmetics...'
how made de, but brand is"do not use"
lol. three substance frm our brand,
lip balm, sun block, n one wash face one...
calisa boliao leh.. ask everyone want to try her lip balm or not.
so much for empasizing on "DO NOT USE"
we will preserve the liaberation of side effects which..
u all cnnt sue us on legal coz of the contract.
Nobody will buy it..
but we intending to give one to mrs whelan..
siva too i think...
ya there r groups.
i'm with guanwei, hongyi, fiona n calisa..
redzuan want to follow elizabeth leh..
i feel something going on there...
CHECK! o.o
BEWARE!!
well, its nice....
but its even nicer when it contribute to my CCA points..
^^must hav counted into it...
it must hav!
didn do much actually..
stared..
watch..
wash..
play a little..
stir a little..
hongyi copy wad i say a little..
eat a little(ling jie eat a lot!!)
i consider little liao lorh as compared to those hungry ghost.
didn talk much.
feeling empty inside..
looking at the sky..
wow getting more n more like meiting while meiting...
getting more n more unlike her.
-.-
n we all went home..
nothing much.
sianz-.-
exam coming... more sianz..

awww
LOVE is in the air!!
duntell me bout the sources..
i dunwanna know..
teachers r busying preparing for the sec 4s "o"
they think sec 3 is gd now uh?
not a chance!!
dunno why but meiting n sean kept picking on some stupid qns for me to do..
recess also must stay there teach meiting..
with her stupid qns..
n stay back to make the lantern..
but hey hey hey ppl will think..
they r not on my class u see...
then if i help them means that i'm a traitor of my class.
XD maybe i'm a spy! O.O""
lols. sean got a lot of ppl like wor...
hahas.talked bout who like us..
zz. heard bout the wen wen girl again...
guilt swept pass me...
when i heard her name..
i was like, ouhk, how do they know bout the malaysian anyways?
i should lhav forgotten bout it already!
coz i written that situation out in a chinese compo...
in sec 2 i think...
n when i wrote something...
i forgot that something...
why they had to remind me..
which set me thinking...
why last time i was like constantly bulling her with my friends!!??
i hope she wasn't hurt ba...
last time saw her when taking mrt..
she's still cool, waving at me too..
kays gtg bye!

ppl r so busy in preparing for examination...
since when they r so harworking uh?
things became more n more clearer..
i shouldn't think bout her..
with him round, always give me that kind of face..
that _____ i shan't say it..
maybe it relli IS true ba..
wad the others hav telling me these days...
he relli IS that type of person..
can't he just relaxed a bit?
even i, the most insensitive person in the world.
k, i had some prejudce(dunno how to spell) against him.
BUT i wun make my emotions take control of me.
u sux.
can't chilled out yoz...
not like i was tryin' nae steal his gf likedat manz..
wad's with the gestures n ignorance?
u relli r fake...
coated in wad wad wad skin(i know my english very bad)
at least i was tryin to use wad sean use to improve its chinese!!
we sux but nvm, we got ourselves to depend on..
its time to be indepedent..
i dun need her anymore..
i think it through, but ur attitude sux.
no one's gonna steal ur girl that is.
coz there's a new her on me list.
mind you,
i'm not ur yan zhong ding(middle eye nail)
dun pick it on me fool.

gonna failed for my chem test...
just know bout it in this morning when shifu inform me..
no time to study..
duneven have the book with me
Dead, that is..

haiz...
sad sad sad larhhs..
friday hor, suai suai got diarreo(dunno how to spell)
go to toilet sibei many times!!
because of her simi rotten apple..
keep getting more n more jealous n du lan nowadays..
although i shouldn't!!! i AM forbid to!
time limit is gaining on me..
the exams is round the corner..
n all i do is to stand by n look at it coming..
english, hmm, 9more days uh?
seems like no test at all to me..
n npcc that day worhx.
not feeling well ma still..
ask me to do tedious things..
could they as least lessen my workload a bit?
wad if i was gone?
wad if i leave no trace at all n flown to other countries?
wad if...?
if is always a thinking qns, not a fact.
today...
saw her walking up the bus when i came..
i was bout to miss her, going to school that late..
almost late for the change up period..
but she was still there..
disappointing maybe?
as usual, cnnt keep my eyes off her..
n watches the bus slowly grind their way out the slope.
our school is relli on low buget lorhh
hahas, then back to npcc.
should go there for some stupid service day or something..
which is also not reflected on my CCA sheet.
2 times liao..
grr, must scold her liao larhh.
actually i was only partner with a girl peiying at first..
but zhaohong say cnnt so little ppl..
in the end spilt to two groups,
each with 5+ ppl.
then ghanshiang want me in his group.
made a swop again.
then waliao, ppl scratching back hor..
mr paul tan think i was raising up hand..
volunteering myself to act like asking him some qns..
to say the truth, i was relli quite well in acting..
should have joined english club when i hav the chance..
coz last time, i thought english club got english dance,
chinese one got chinese.. misinterpret the word so didn take.

fought with my father AGAIN tonight..
dunno simi daji, he always tryin' pick a fight with me..
too bad i ain't no pushover..
talk until he sibei dulan..
then nothing to say coz i say all the dao li(destination mark)
he onli cn keep quiet..
n i talk until i no kou shui(saliva) liao hor..
he give me that gong gong face..
wa, talking to him very lang fei kou shui ok(wasting my saliva)

no one had been tagging lately..
not even my darling T.T
lols. back to some serious actions

the teachers damn stupid...
so many things forgot to include on my CCA record..
other CCA like band n dance cn easily get in 20++
i came for all the trainings,
mei gong lao ye you gu lao ok(no merit also got credit)
then they give me a pitiful mark...
pls larh, sean anyhow work also cn get like me sia..
then i check,
wah, the things not included cn filled in 5 forms!!
i was like wtf!!??
when i wrote until the 4th paper,
ppl were like begging me to stop writing..
of coz i dun listen to them..
but my memory bad, must hear Zhen Yang's written things,
how leh?
btw zhenyang also get 18 onli lorh, n ITS THE BEST FOR NPCC..
having to go for those cssp larh,
NE camp larh,
junxiang go for the national day thingy larh..
Still onli got 10++ onli wor..
NPCC like shit manz..
shouldn't hav join..
ava anyhow do also kena 10++ liao..zz
lao hu bu fa wei, dang wo shi bing mao ar?(copy frm jingyi de)
(tiger if dun act like one, worst, meow, ppl will treat it as a sick cat)
having writting down so many participation in competetion n everything,
i'm sure i cn AT LEAST score A2 for that report.
n that's gd enough for me..
20 marks i think... some day might turn down..
must think of that as well ma..

u love someone,
u must wish her to be happy...
not cursing n swearing against him..
in the dark( not me)
i'm trying to get used to it..
not to change anything al'

finally the end of my life is near...
going to EOY liao n my english is still...
-.- failing grades...
i MUST GET to sec 4..
damn u will nvr see me repeat..
ok, today is damn hell..
english teacher, angelia nvr come..
chemistry becoming doing survey...
geography was like expressway liao...
i dunno wadeva she's talking..
die liao larhh

first let's read through some mails..
TAURUS - The Tramp Aggressive. Loves being in long relationships. Likes
to give a good fight for what t hey want. Extremely outgoing. Loves to
help people in times of need. Good kisser. Good personality. Stubborn. A
caring person. One of a kind. Not one to mess with. Are the most
attractive people on earth! 15 years of bad luck if you do not forward.
i'm 15 that's why this is so true to me.. wahh..lols

9 Words Women Use

1.) Fine : This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
2.) Five Minutes : If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to
watch the game before helping around the house.
3.) Nothing : This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
4.) Go Ahead : This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
5.) Loud Sigh : This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and
wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)
6.) That's Okay : This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
7.) Thanks : A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you're welcome.
8.) Whatever : Is a women's way of saying F$%K YOU!
9.) Don't worry about it, I got it : Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it
herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to #3.
this one of coz i made de..
make frm my experience towards a girl
believe it!! its SO true


life is becoming better..
well, let's dun mention my results,my books,my table k
life is better..
with friends aside me..
i think i cn better study..
with someone around watching me..
i relli need to be watched 24 hours round the clock mind ya..
learn new verbs.. humph,
when's my spelling test?
lolx. k didn copy but manage not to be scolded by Mr Oh
heng manz.. coz that time, i heard shifu's voice..
then i got the perfect answer up at the board..
has shifu gone to heaven already?
HE CN GO TO HEAVEN!!??
lols, saw shafiq n cheated him..
said that mdm is already there liao..
he scared n dun ever want to go in..
nvm lo.. his that thing will be there lo...
why cn he skip anyways? he was the one who telling me not to skip..
DARN.. F you..
lol then they talk bout a lot of jokes n stuffs..
i was about to raise hand when mdm say, 'game over'
darn darn darn.
luck's not shining but, life's winning.
i'm done.

looking at the title...
u might think this entry is damn boring..
who m i kidding? no one read entries nowadays..
nvm, today started with a bad hair day for sean..
n also, a quite all well copying week AGAIN for me..
shit, i nvr change did i not?
being with those fuckin' teachers, i think i became more...
unfairness.i felt more unfairness..
Angelia Tan, u all should know, especially when i ask meiting to bring back n do..
she got 15 where he common standards is nowhere below 18..
Celia Wong, instead of adding my marks, she actually,
minus off marks frm Elyn.waliao. n n i lost one mark because of wad know?
coz i hav no space to write the explaination of diagrams so i write below,
indicating 1) 2) n 3) but then, they minus a whole 1 mark...
i cn get the best for humantities if i want to dude..
but those jack ass just dun let me...
i feel like crying more than before..
crybaby.. haiz...
i even cried at pulau ubin... SHIT!!!
now "she" saw me cry liao..
issit relli ashamed? crying infront of ladies?

fuck-ups. now back to my story bout today..
first is chem lab training which jaslyn dunno do wad...
we got the wrong one i think.. but better than some of them anyways.
then , english which meiting got just pass. yeah, i told ya.
recess!! darling, i hate u first!!
keep sean's milo with me all day.
now its still in the freezer..
let's dun talk but maths, physics, n MT
those boring sub shall we?
oh yeah, one more thing..
SHE SUX.. HATE HER..
HE SUX.. HATE HIM..
suck-ups, better off dead u two!!
some ppl just so hard to get along manz..
i should hav become more like bernard,
n those fuckin words came out of my fcukin mouth before..
i would like to type ur name down but i wun..
IDOITS MORONS, u think u great!!?? u just better than me in some sub..
for instance, ENGLISH!!>.<
u SUX GREATLY, n everyone know u SUX.
just that they dunsay out, doesn't mean it dun exist.
Mother fucker, u r a pain in my ass.
late late late, those idoits dragging me outta nowhere..
n i cnnt believe i actually played with them..
u guys r wasting my precious time.
i demand for a refund.
those suck-ups just SUX,
ALOT.

FUCK OFF LA YOU!

the time has come..
for me to accept my destiny..
i meant the holiday has ended..
time for them to scold me lerhh..
i keept saying i will change..
i wun copy anymore...
but that doesn't entirely right..
i had been busying these days..
with stuffs u wun wanna know..
so i'm done now.. time for me to pay the price...
or should i copy again?
become the before old me?
i decided to burn midnight oil n finish it up..
hope i cn do that..

i had no expectation for tomorow...
i felt entire emptiness in my life..
now i felt..nothing

i think its time for me to grow up...
seeing others moving on to greater heights..
matured during days of hardships..
develop their own careers or interest..
knowing wad they should or wanna be..

me? i'm still the same old winson.
regardless of how many challenges i faced..
how many sufferings inflicted on me..
i m still so immature..childish..
hearing things like
"winson is the most childish person in our squad lorhh"
"if u matured i popo/ah gong liao lo"
"stop crapping winson"
"dun be lame or childish. ppl'll nvr respect u in this state"
so that's the comment i got..
continously for the past few yrs...
ppl fully live their best..
cherish their memories n moving on.
i'm still a cry baby..
fifteen but emotionally hurt...
by friends n sort..
dunwanna talk bout it..
but ppl r asking me..
digging the wound right inside me..
they were killing me..
keep talking bout her name..
keep asking me wad feelings i have for her now..
their concern r being much hurt than console..
but i told them, i'll get over her..
although "will" is a future tense..

i still holding back on my past..
perhaps i should abandoned it..
every single memories..
to have a brand new me..
a decisive, confident, successful me..
perhaps i will nvr change even when i grow old..
i'll become "lao wan tong"(childish ah gong)


problems r so irritating n i usually ran away frm it
leaving it behind while it accumulate itself..
i dunno who to trust anymore..
i dunno who's my friends..

as wad asmita say, some r just her hi,bye friends
m i her hi,bye friend as well?
relli confuse bout life..
she's like the lamp shinning through my room,
telling me the solutions for this problems..
but she's gone now.. so m i lost?
the feel of lost stinks!>.<
i feel like a child, lost in cwp...
everyone's doing their own stuffs,
no one actually ask bout who i m...
no one actually bothers...
i cried.


yesterday's a long day,
first i go to make-up lesson..
learn much more things than classes..
i'm paying attention to teacher maybe..
redzuan n the others took out the tcher's sweets..
while she's outta class to revive the computer..
maybe i should expose them of their prepostorous deeds..
well, i didn =P
asmita is relli great...
her smile can wake the dead!
laughing awake!!O.O
she's always so cheerful...
barely realise that this is the girl who cried seeing her mid-yr results..
sit with her while at bus 912..
talk bout lots of things..
hi bye friend n sort..
i was just thinking of saying something just now..
but oh well, i forgot so nvm.. xD
then i go for the terrorism thingy..
i was late becoz of that F**** mrt!!
say wad not meant for passenger? oh yeah?
i saw someone in there!..
shafiq n chaoying were later than me so nvm..
its raining heavily..
making me emo again...
in the table, didn talk much..
not like me.. heard her name..
well, that's a common name..
but zhenyang n shafiq both turned n look at me..
i was feeling sad n trying to avoid her name!!
WHY DOESN"T ANYONE UNDERTAND!!??
WHY EVEN STRANGERS HURT ME!!??
ok chill, then i stand up..
tell the fuckin' idoit
"look, somebody's tryin' na calm down here by going to this event VOLUNTARILY,
n why dude? coz he wanna work himself to death by avoiding prob"
the above weren't true..
in actually fact, i covered my head n started...
k now for the later part..
the food is quite appetising..
hmm, the questions were quite good..
god damn it..
the fat little guy ask,"there seems to be a little commotion down there"
"the guy with the deep in thought posture(me)pls if u hav any qns"
coz i was thinking to say..
"putting so many cameras in school was invading our privacy.. woodlands ring sec, my school is a GREAT example..it has camera everywhere.. but wad's the use.. theft n such crimes still occurs. wad more? student think they were being watch, a typical jail. we weren't criminals, why should we be treated like one? why would we be sort of like "serving jail term" just because of some mather fuckin' idoit who ran round stealing other ppl's things"
HOWEVER, i wasn't able to say that..
wtf, everyone was like looking at me "deep-in-thought"
i was like dead..
ok, manage to laugh off my probs..
took chaoying's free ride home..
oh yeahh(:

pictures r not now yet.,.
lazy to upload, but going to..
after i finihs my hw of coz..
dunwanna copy anymore.. just work myself to death..
death? oh yeahh i will pei ni one dunworry meiting

today...
wah, topics girls manz!! but today is exceptional..
i wun be talking bout "her once..
k i mention it AGAIN..
nvm..yesterday..got one girl ar..
frm st. nicholas girl sec hor.. wave n say gdbye to me..
she say"BYE!!WINSON!!"i was like..
excuse me do i know you? coz i was half-way through the road..
sean n meiting should know.. i jaywalk.. is relli walk one..
as if i owned the road likedat but damn sua sua no road accident((:
then i walk back again n my squadmates started crossing the road..
i followed them of coz.. n at that time..i still wondering..who called me arh?
then she say "BYE BYE WINSON!!" again.. waving her hands high up in the air..
i was like turning round n see if anyone beside me that she maybe talking to..
but there was only jiaen beside me n she's not responding..
they suddenly become very quiet as if they dunwan me to know them..
i tried to walk back up to the other side of the road while yinching stopped me
n dragged me to the other bus stop.. i decided on going back again..
then the bus came..all was like so.. immediate that i took the bus..
tough luck! The bus took a WHOLE big round..
n junchao, shafiq, n yanxiang got a taxi without our consent..
GRRR.. nvm they got $$$ i also got $$$ but dunwan to use on such..
so..i nvr actually replied the nicholas girls..
today..
again!! everyone started talking bout..
yinching flirting with the juniors n his classmates..
genliang flirting with squadmates..
n waliao.. winson flirting with STRANGERS!!??
during the lecture.. they told me "she" was looking at me..
but when i turned back.. she already.. acting very good..
perhaps i did the same in class toher too..
back to the topic..
i changed seat with jiaen..
cnnt bear to sit next..
nvm. then jiaen told me..
somebody was turning to look at her..
saw that it was not me..
n she heard a winson being called..
n great commotion going on there..
yanxiang, genliang, junchao, jiaen all heard..
couldn't all be wrong could it?
genliang wouldn't hav gang up with them to cheat me ba..
then i ask one qns..
"who is going to undress for the unconsious female victims?"
a sensitive topic but they manage to see where i m..
frm jiaen"when they saw u hor, they say norh, him him HIM"
Ouh.. i ask"they chio ma? got wear spect or not?hairstyle wad de?"
then i manage to get the following information..
1)Chio bu x)
2)didn wear spect.
3) sgt rank(higher than me x[ )
these r the onli 3..
didn get to see them again coz..
we decided to WALK to chua chu kang mrt
it was quite an ADVENTURE!! x)
got a few pic but some deleted by yanxiang n junchao..
fuckin assholes..
the pic will leave it for tomorow..
for now.. let's just settle down..
coz there's a REALLY long they tomorow for me..
night everyone!! =DDD

A lie had just been exposed yesterday night...
i cnnt believe i'm so stupid...
so foolish, idoitic...thinking my "friend" wun lie to me...
he say" he solely want to help me"
maybe if he told me the truth...
things might had gotten worst or..
he think that it might have gotten worst..
i dunblame him...
coz the stupid bloddy bastard in other words, ME
still believe in this friendship...
i still believing in it..coz i'm a loner..
i need friends but nvr get any...
i want friends..
this yearning had corrupted me to..
make my belief in friends stronger..
but he would hav to break it...
maybe this was the first time i was actually..
CHEATED!!!
i was cheated without my consent!!
i actually shi suan becoz of this belief i hav in you!!
ARGH!!
NOOOOO!..
i was like..
when i learned bout the truth, frm my sources..
i was.. no...it cn't be him.. he had no reason to..
but at last..he admit it himself..
i cnnt believe it!..
ok, i'm sort of losing myself here..
so was it that u ask me things..
so was it that u concern bout me all of a sudden..
all beczuse of guilty consious in urself!!??
of u r reading this post..
i dunrelli blame you..
instead i thank you for "solely trying to help me"
u did something right..
keep it up!..
n.. dun make her sad..
or else i dun fang guo ni..
she's happy, i'm fine.



stupid police knowledge today..
fuckin bitch, FUCK OFF!..
wah she's damn idoit..
n hor the stupid sir hor..
i cnnt open the door he say like"you nvr eat rice issit?(chinese)"
mother fucker..
then when he , "try" to open for me..
he was like using his full strength..
i saw his jaws dripped open..
later i say..nvm la..
n open the door for HIM
"thanks anyways, 'but i think u nvr eat enough rice"
ps:i eaten 3 servings of rice today..he dare say?
waahahhahas

I feel so alone..
no one's there to accompany me..
lessen my painfulness..
my mind is in a whirl..
just by looking at you..
walking off my sight..
drops of tears ran down my cheeks..
from that moment..
i realised, understand, learned..
my life is nvr complete without you...
i still cnnt straightened my thinkings out..
even now, my thoughts r being polluted by you...
i still got a mindset that..
even the sky falls,
even earth crumbles..
that instance, my thoughts were only of you..
i cnnt stop myself anymore..
but wad cn i do?
i'm willing to do anything...
but wad's the right thing?
should i keep straightening out my thinking?
before i even friend you?
or should i annouced...
frm this day onwards, i'll start wooing you?
or should i just keep quiet...
as a stupid person in school...
who have no friends...
a loner..?
or should i friend you?
n in return secretly loving you?
or should i make myself even better...
study harder..
getting better grades than anyone..
having qualified to love u openly?
or should i dunstand in ur way..
give you my blessings n walk away?


i dare not wish forever..
i just want one minute..
i just want you for one minute..


the death of one is the born of another..
perhaps, life IS likedat..
perhaps this is fated..
perhaps, i was fated to bear these pain..
i dun blame you, actually..

recieved a sad news..
i'm so sad..
i wanna cry..
no one's here for mee...
maybe, that's the best ending for us..
maybe..
we will meet other ppl better
maybe this is all fate..
maybe we will learn something from this..
maybe,
life's not just bout games n stuffs



every beginning has an end
n this marks the end

You ready?! Lets go!
Yeah, for those of you that want to know what we're all about
It's like this y'all (c'mon!)

[Chorus]
This is ten percent luck, twenty percent skill
Fifteen percent concentrated power of will
Five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain
And a hundred percent reason to remember the name!

Mike! - He doesn't need his name up in lights
He just wants to be heard whether it's the beat or the mic
He feels so unlike everybody else, alone
In spite of the fact that some people still think that they know him
But fuck em, he knows the code
It's not about the salary
It's all about reality and making some noise
Makin the story - makin sure his clique stays up
That means when he puts it down Tak's pickin it up! let's go!

Who the hell is he anyway?
He never really talks much
Never concerned with status but still leavin them star struck
Humbled through opportunities given to him despite the fact
That many misjudge him because he makes a livin from writin raps
Put it together himself, now the picture connects
Never askin for someone's help, to get some respect
He's only focused on what he wrote, his will is beyond reach
And now when it all unfolds, the skill of an artist

It's just twenty percent skill
Eighty percent beer
Be one hundred percent clear cause Ryu is ill
Who would've thought that he'd be the one to set the west in flames
And I heard him wreckin with The Crystal Method, "Name Of The Game"
Came back dropped Megadef, took em to church
I like bleach man, why you have the stupidest verse?
This dude is the truth, now everybody be givin him guest spots
His stock's through the roof I heard he fuckin with S. Dot!

[Chorus]

They call him Ryu The Sick
And he's spittin fire with Mike
Got him out the dryer he's hot
Found him in Fort Minor with Tak
Been a fuckin annihilist porcupine
He's a prick, he's a cock
The type woman want to be with, and rappers hope he get shot
Eight years in the makin, patiently waitin to blow
Now the record with Shinoda's takin over the globe
He's got a partner in crime, his shit is equally dope
You wont believe the kind of shit that comes out of this kid's throat

Tak! - He's not your everyday on the block
He knows how to work with what he's got
Makin his way to the top
People think its a common owners name
People keep askin him was it given at birth
Or does it stand for an acronym?
No he's livin proof, Got him rockin the booth
He'll get you buzzin quicker than a shot of vodka with juice
Him and his crew are known around as one of the best
Dedicated to what they doin give a hundred percent

Forget Mike - Nobody really knows how or why he works so hard
It seems like he's never got time
Because he writes every note and he writes every line
And I've seen him at work when that light goes on in his mind
It's like a design is written in his head every time
Before he even touches a key or speaks in a rhyme
And those motherfuckers he runs with, those kids that he signed?
Ridiculous, without even trying, how do they do it?!

[Chorus - repeat 2x]

[Outro - Mike Shinoda]
Yeah! Fort Minor
M. Shinoda - Styles of Beyond
Ryu! Takbir! Machine Shop!

hey guys,
first thing first...
we had the bloody netball...
with the fat round aisah running round in circles...
tha jia li hai one bealy manage to scores goals but she still did..
suprisingly as at first half, as soon as she hold's the ball...
WITHOUT slipping the ball off away from her hands again(slippery maybeor the ball dunlike her)....
it marks the end of the first half...
that whelan more pro!! hahas, at least she got zi zhi zhi ming...
know that her skills are that lan that, cnnt even become like mrs aisah...
then it was the soccer n basketball,
which sean, meiting, sherlin n i did nothin but just blank talking at lao ngoh's suprise turnover...
maybe there's a singapore's extreme makeover which hadn't be shown in singapore maybe...
then we go to have our class party which the other class started already n poor 3e2...
want to wait for mdm chong n mr oh before we cn da chi yi dun...
Are we a bunch of morons or a loyal n faithful class?
well, i gotta admit, genius n fools were only one line apart...
but i still like the class!!!(: as i prefer to think oursellves as loyal n faithful...
since i m famished, i grab some food frm all the classes our there...
which my class r very unhappy about...
promoting 3/3's food i guess..hahas
then it was the runaway ms low..
where the game instruction was to find her N jeremy see N mr paul tan
jeremy n paul tan were easy, not even a challenge...
but miss low was damn difficult...
espically i was handling with miss low's present while running high n low to look for her...
tough luck... we ran all round the school after sean's friend told him she's in the staff room...
We cleared the game!!! no sweat dudes n babes,
i hardly use my one percent!
now for the concert which maiting went running about for her things...
RELAXED MISS WOON!!! THE THINGS R WITH MEEEE!!!!!!!
n she set's off crying like hell...
while sabrina said another..."i hate eu first ar! n i know u love me" again
since when this become our good morning phrases?
i kinda like it btw...
wakao, the concert was damn long...\
i was like waiting for power rangers to showed up but then..
power rangers turns out to be mr siva...
oppes! student visa...want the credit card visa? yes he's promoting that..
n D.L, Jack Chong, Mrs Kok, n wadeva wadeva...
cnnt believe it!!my testi were actually right up there!!
dunno what the hell m i thinking out n wad have i written there...
its something good i hope...
sean n meiting was you yu bu jue when i influence their mind wtih black acid...
finally, they were completely influence n agreed to runaway with me...
we made our getaway, 12.46 SHARP!
the two security guards were there guarding...
Ready...All set...GOOOOooooooo!!!! n we made our escaped!!!
the bus come so fast until i duneven have time to say cheese...
everything was happening so fast n bomb! the bus closed its fuckin door...
we r safe...for NOW....
my commrades, siqi, Andy, xiaoting, n leixin were waiting for me there...
saw many ppl... richard, lynn, wen hui, her yun, katherine, yao zou, jeff, n sumo
yeah still good with them but they seemed...small..compared to the past..
i grown!!wahahahastaller than them wor...
Alot of them smoke now...
zhaohong came late..cn see the gate closing btw....
n constantly meeting sherlin in causeway...
i end off...